Sarit Catz Blog
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I hope I’m not giving away my age.
Used to be summer was the season when the networks would show us comedy/variety shows. I think “The Carpenters,” “Tony Orlando and Dawn,” and “The Captain and Tennille” were all summer series. (I could be wrong here because I was EXTREMELY young. EXTREMELY.)
And in the fall when I was a kid, I used to love when all the new shows premiered. I would watch everything that looked interesting, then decide what shows I would watch each night. On Friday nights, when I could stay up late, it was “The Brady Bunch,” “The Partridge Family,” “Room 222,” “The Odd Couple,” and “Love, American Style.” (It’s amazing how late my parents let me stay up as a newborn isn’t it? Are you buying it?)
I knew what was on, when it was on, and I could count on it. Monday I watched these shows. Tuesday I watched those shows. And so on. There was a time when people could work a long day, come home, flip on their shows, and veg out in front of the TV. Not anymore.
Now, the networks complain that everyone’s watching on Tivo, but it’s the only way you can find your shows. Because sometimes the show is on Tuesday, sometimes Wednesday. Sometimes Tuesday and Wednesday. Sometimes at 9:00, sometimes at 9:30. Sometimes it starts at 9:07 and ends at 9:41. Sometimes, too late, you missed it. It was on at 8:00. Two days ago. I can’t work this hard to watch TV.
And the shows mostly aren’t worth watching. Every show is a contest or competition. “Piratemaster,” for chrissake! “Piratemaster.”
Dancing, singing, interior design, stand-up comedy, dating, cardgames – if they can pit people against each other, it’s now a TV show. Fashion designers, hair dressers, models. Next thing you know, it’ll be kids on the schoolyard. Who’s going to use the monkeybars first? Find out next week on “Rock, Paper, Scissors.” (Don’t use that. I’ve got a pitch meeting next week.)
Let me say, “reality” shows aren’t real. When was the last time you were on a clipper ship hunting for buried treasure? Or trained to be a professional wrestler? Or dated Flavor Flav? If this is reality, I’ve been living a very sheltered life.
Now I know that “American Idol” and “Dancing with the Stars” are big hits. But so was “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?” and the first season of “Survivor.” These shows don’t sustain. You’ve seen one B-lister cha-cha, you’ve seen them all. Eventually the bloom will be off the “American Idol” rose as well. And these shows are the top of the top of the reality heap. Mostly it’s “Piratemaster,” for chrissake! “Piratemaster.”
Is it just me? I am not that interested in “real” people. I know lots of real people already, thank you very much. I am much more interested in the stories that creative people make up and talented people portray and brave people bring to the public. Stories that make a statement or have a point-of-view. Stories that enlighten or entertain.
Or at least that you can find on the night it’s supposed to be on. How’s that for a bare minimum? Give it a timeslot and leave it there.
Luckily, summer is the time you get really fun movies. I recently saw “Knocked Up,” and it was really pretty good. I laughed out loud a bunch of times. I’m for that. Last week I took my daughter to see “Nancy Drew,” and I think they did a great job. They took the old-fashioned-ness of the character and embraced it. Very cute.
And I can’t wait for “Live Free or Die Hard.” You can’t have a better time in the summer than sitting in the air-conditioned theater with a big tub of popcorn, watching cars flip over and go flying into helicopters. I’m also really looking forward to “Transformers.” Two alien robot races wage war on Earth. Good times.
I remember when Transformers were toys. Okay, you got me. I’m that old.
In fact, I’m so old, I could be on “The Age of Love,” competing with other women to date a second-tier professional tennis player. But I’m probably not skinny enough. First I’d have to go on “Celebrity Fit Club.” But I’m not a semi-celebrity so before that, I’d have to go on “The Amazing Race” to get my fifteen minutes of fame. Better yet, I could stage a mutiny on “Piratemaster.” “Piratemaster,” for chrissake! “Piratemaster.”
Somewhere Brandon Tartikoff is spinning in his grave. And if he is, and they can videotape it, I’m sure some network would broadcast it. Thursday at 8:08 and Friday at 9:34.
The hell with it. Go to the movies. That’s where I’ll be.
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