Precious Chong Blog February 13th - 2007
Precious Chong starts off with a dream I have an audition for a pilot. It's a comedy. I'm pretty prepared but in the waiting room just before I go in I realize the scene starts with naming these fruit and two of them are such obscure, rare fruit I don't recognize them. One of the other actresses waiting tells me what they are called just before she goes in. I try and memorize the names but I promptly forget one of them. Then I go into the room and it's a producers session. My dad, who had auditioned earlier, is there. But so is Fred Willard who just slips in before I start and some producers. I start and I sort of improvise the beginning but it's good because so does the casting director. But as the scene goes on it gets harder and harder because even though I've worked on it, it's as if I've never even read it. There are these awkward pauses that just kill every joke and finally I read a line that doesn't make sense because I don't do the physical action. So I say "And this would've been funny if I had done this" and repeat the action. The room is silent. Then the casting director is just sitting there waiting and I'm waiting thinking there is another line and so we stay there in this holding pattern and my head is buried in my sides trying to find out what line we are at. Then I realize the scene is over and then she says, really pissed "I was waiting for you". So we go to the next scene and for some reason the scene is handwritten and barely legible so I just say "Let's stop right there" and break down crying. "I hate auditions" I say. "Maybe you could teach English?" she suggests. "My mom would love you" I say. Then we keep talking and it stops being awkward and I go and leave and she says "I'm glad we talked you warmed up". But I walk out of there and immediately want to go and buy cigarettes. "Maybe it was because Dad was there?" I think. Then I wake up. Precious Chong in Los Angeles Sorry to write about a dream. They're boring to talk about etc...It was even in Oprah's magazine "O" under things that are rude to do. Oh well. Sue me. I'm in Los Angeles and it's about 3 am because I keep going to sleep at around 9 o'clock because of the time change. I got my hair cut today and at the salon I overhear a group of woman talking about Anna Nicole Smith's death. I eavesdrop. "And he starts crying and I'm like it's not like it's Princess Di or something, but I guess he had worked for her". I look up and realize the girl is talking to Tara Reid. It feels like a bonanza of pop culture. Then I go upstairs and I proceed to hear a rumor about Anna Nicole Smith that is so wrong I wish it wasn't in my brain. And no, I'm not going to repeat it here. Precious Chong talks about being famous Celebrity. Being famous. I was in People magazine when I was a kid because they were doing an article on my father. They took pictures of us at home. I remember wearing my new designer jeans, a vest and a white man’s shirt that I loved (I just reread that and it sounds like I’m being racist in the oddest way, but no a shirt that is a man’s and is the color white). I was around twelve and my younger brother who was a total ham is making a muscle for the camera. I look self conscious. That same year I was in this T.V. special for year of the child. It had nothing to do with my father but the dance studio I went to “Al Gilbert” was called and they asked if they had some kids who could be in the show. They came and filmed us take a ballet class and then later that week we went to a soundstage and filmed the live segment with Bonnie Franklin the host and Michael Jackson pre-surgery. I remember being on the stage and looking like a “kid” while Bonnie Franklin sang to us. She was really spunky. I also remember being backstage with Michael Jackson who was waiting to go on. I was dying to talk to him because I was a huge fan of his. I had his “Ben” album and I think that “Off the Wall” was out. I didn’t say anything to him but studied him. He seemed really shy and even nervous. Precious Chong and her famous father That’s a question I used to get asked a lot when people find out I have a famous father. Did I get to meet and hang out with a lot of famous people? I used to live next door to Jlo when she was just a fly girl and not even acting. We both were living with boyfriends and our places were so close together I could hear everything. Her having sex, her getting jobs “Pookie, I got the Janet Jackson tour!! Oh my god!”, Her fighting with him “I just want us to be happy!”. Then when we’d run into each other at the grocery store we’d pretend not to notice each other. She never seemed very friendly but had mojo, even then. But one of the weirdest experiences was when I was doing a play in Ventura. There was a gas station across from the theater where I’d buy a decaf before the show. So I’m standing in line and the guy in front of me says to the cashier “did you know Tommy Chong’s daughter is in the play?” And the cashier says “Oh yeah” and then the guy asks “What’s he doing, now, anyways?” and the cashier says “Oh he died.” “Really?” the guy asks “Oh yeah he had a long illness and died. I don’t know what it was”. After I tell my dad the story and he says, “Well, I guess I need a new publicist”.
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