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Jane Clark Blog - March 30th 2007
Jane Clark - Actor turned Filmmaker
Well, I just think it is curious how the universe works. I was an actor for quite awhile. And while I booked work, the indie films I did never went anywhere, the stage plays didn't pay and the recurring I had on "Chicago Hope" never advanced past, "Dr. you are wanted in OR 2 stat." Frustrated by the lack of control over my career and the outcome of projects I thought would be great and turned out less than acceptable, I decided to produce and direct my own short. That way if it didn't work I knew who to blame -- myself. That first short turned out pretty well. The end result is in desperate need of color correction and a tighter edit, but the audiences responded and a filmmaker was born. I starred in that first short. It worked because it was a personal story that I was intimately connected with, but it was hard work and difficult to split the focus into so many different facets. If I was going to go forward on this new career path I would have to put the acting aside. And I opted to do that. I was hooked on directing. While I missed the acting -- if you've ever performed on stage, film or television you will understand -- producing and directing gave me a sense of control over my destiny. Something that is very rare in the acting world. I have made three shorts that have been successful, and am now trying to finance several feature scripts I have. I have my mind completely focussed on the future as a filmmaker. So much so that while I was at Sundance I got an email from the casting director at Grey's Anatomy requesting my avail to play a nurse on that coming Wed. A producer from "Chicago Hope" had remembered me, was directing and episode and asked them to track me down and offer me the nurse role in his episode. I didn't think twice, but emailed back saying thanks but I was at Sundance and wasn't available. Four years ago I would have booked a flight back to do that job. Despite that, a month or so later I got another call with another offer and last Wednesday I went in and shot a scene for the new pilot spin off of Grey's. When I left that same producer said they would definitely be calling me again for more work and I was happy to hear it, but not for the same reasons I would have been happy four years ago. I find it interesting that in my life, when I have really wanted and cared about something it was hard work to achieve a goal. But when I let go of the need, things came with ease. The nurse role on "Grey's" was very similar to all the other episodes I did for "Chicago Hope." The nurse consultant was even the same person. But I was not. I didn't worry about messing up, or in some way disappointing the people that hired me. Nor did I worry if they would call me again. It didn't matter. Not that I wanted to suck. I still did my job and did it well. But it was with confidence and ease, because the need was no longer there. I do hope they call me again. It's good money and a fun diversion for a few hours. But it is a job, now and not a dream or a wish or a hope and that's good. I am going to take that lesson and apply it to my filmmaking. To always remember that making films isn't a dream or wish or hope. It is a job. Jane Clark Writer/Director/Producer FilmMcQueen, LLC 323/654-0115 W 323/633-8193 C filmmcqueen@yahoo.com www.filmmcqueen.com Return from Jane Clark Blog to WILDsound Filmmaking Feedback Events home page
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